Orientation – Self-knowledge
How To Get To Know Yourself
TO FEEL, THINK AND ACT. What do we have to observe in ourselves? Sometimes, “acting” is conditioned to the circumstances or people act for duty or responsibility.
Regarding “Thinking”, sometimes one person thinks in a certain way because he made his thinking the others’ one, either out of the admiration or the education he have received.
TO FEEL gives us greater guarantees to tell that it is really ours. Therefore, here we start, and based on it; we must build the thought that ultimately will determine our way of acting.
FEELING is the starting point.
There is much talk of looking within one in order to know oneself, but not always understood how to do this. This is made “paying attention” to what you feel about everything: activities, ways of thinking, regulations, things, attitudes, etc, to start telling apart the way you see things from the way you see the rest.
For that, you must stop considering “how to think” about certain situations or “How others expect you to think”, but as you feel them. Neither “how to do this or that” but how you would do it.
Thereby you will discover: What you prefer, what catches your eye, what you decline, what you long for, what you dream of, what you feel capable of, what does not matter to you, what does your imagination use?, Which are your fantasies, what are you afraid of, Which things are more valuable for you; how you want others to see you? As an intelligent, endearing, beautiful, strong, imaginative, generous, competent, creative or friendly person, etc.? You hope them all, right? But, which are the ones you lean more on?
Pay attention to pain.
In terms of feeling, psychic pain is the only thing that can lead you to miss you self-knowledge.
Don’t confuse rejection for something just because you don’t like it or you are not interested, with something you reject because it hurts you.
This could lead you to make mistakes, because this rejection is not part of your nature; it is something that happened to you and it altered your natural way of feeling.
Being able to distinguish yourself from others.
One of the problems, when you want to express the way you are, is that you don’t know what to say or many of your own characteristics cannot be identified.
This is because you cannot see the “contrast with others”; it gives you the impression the whole world is like that and that it is not a singularity of yours.
For example: I consider myself an imaginative person, I tend to think that the world is like that because it is super fun to be like that! Why someone wouldn’t like to be like that? But no, lots of people are indifferent to that and many of them don’t even have noticed this sort of things and you haven’t realized about that.
For this reason, you should evaluate your tastes and abilities in comparison to other tastes and abilities of yourself instead of comparing them with those of the rest.
Example: "I’m better because of my imagination rather than other aspects like sports or math, etc.”
Do not confuse “Being in a way” with “wanting to be that way”.
This often happens with people we admire, it is usual with one of our parents, an artist, a friend, etc. We admire their personality or some skill they possess and unconsciously we stick to that making it ours, without realizing that it does not fit our way of being.
“ “I like the way he bonds with others, how friendly he is, he is so active…” I admire that way of being and being with him I relate to that people too, but once he is not present for a while, I don’t stand that level of relations with them. It indicates that even though I admire that way of being, I’m not like that, I don’t own that level of social involvement.
Also, we could begin to admire and appreciate what that person values, making his yearnings ours.
As I admire that person, I begin to consider important what he considers important to him, for instance, he admires bridges building, dams, roads, among others. So you start to think those things are important, therefore they matter to you.
Then, you realize that only by being with that person you keep that feeling up; without him, you forget those things. Thereupon, you can conclude those things are important for him, but not necessarily for you.
You must be aware this can happen to you, in that case, you must start
You’ll meet people whom you agree on some aspects, but the important thing here is that it has to be something truly yours, that responds to the way you feel and way of being.
Believe in what you’ve got.
Another problem you face when doing your search is that you don’t believe in what you’ve got.
Things out there dazzle you and you seem insignificant in front of them. You think what you’ve got is nothing.
For instance: A famous singer, a great breakthrough, a big company, a literary work, a sports trademark, new technologies, etc. All these things shine because of their development, when they also were born as something insignificant.
Pay attention to your premonitions, fantasies, dreams and digressions of your mind, don’t discard anything, thinking those things are nonsense or meaningless, or that others should have done those things and even better already.
Those things of yours that seem to be insignificant are the key to start putting together the jigsaw puzzle of the panorama of how you are. And is there where your strength is.
Let’s start the change